It's unblunt (nonblunt?) because I have no idea what to feel...and it's hard to be blunt about something if you don't know what to be blunt about. I'm just tired of all these situations going through my head with absolutely no answers...I just have to write them down in hopes to make sense of *any* of it.
So I have this friend...lol (ps this is all from her perspective, it's very one sided)
She really likes this guy, and has for a couple of months, but when they would talk and hang out, he would talk about this other girl that he was kind of sort of with. So, my friend decided that she was fine just being friends with this guy.
Fulling wanting to embrace this newfound friendship, she asked him to see a free performance that the campus offers. He accepted and they went together and had a good time. He walked her back, they talked, hugged, and went their separate ways.
Then all of a sudden they're texting and talking all the time, insinuating that they like each other. They even said that the way they were acting was like leading up to dating. Well my friend decided to ask this guy to another free event--this time a movie--and he accepted again.
Well the day of the event, they started holding hands, held hands all throughout the event, and they went back to her room afterward and he stayed the night. Sounds like mutual likingness if you ask me, right?
Well, they weren't "in a relationship" after that. They were just "dating exclusively" (what's the difference?) I guess it doesn't really matter, she seemed happy, he seemed happy, they were extremely disgusting to watch (in a cute sort of way)
Well they did a month of that dating, and then he decided to ask her to be his girlfriend. She was overjoyed! It was obvious that she was wanting that from the start!
Happily Ever After, right? Come on now, would I be putting this here if it were?
No, She found out last night that the third day they were "in a relationship" he cheated on her. Not like holding hands kissing cheating on her...full out sex with another girl cheating on her. The SAME girl that he was "kind of sort of" with at the beginning of this whole story. She also found out that he did this once while they were "dating exclusively".
She seems to have handled it really well. She didn't cry, but she didn't dump him either. They talked and he seemed really apologetic...HE was crying because he hated seeing her hurt like that...he promised her that he would never hurt her again. So she believed him and gave him a second chance.
Was that the right thing to do? Can he be trusted again? Does he deserve the second chance?
From my point of view, I'd be wondering what I did wrong. I mean, obviously there's the physical commitment that he couldn't get with my friend so he found it elsewhere...but what's to stop him from doing it again? And is it my friends fault for not being ready after a month or so of dating and then relationship...ing? Who does the fault fall to and who deserves to be punished?
Who's in the right? Who's wrong? I hate not knowing...
You see, I say "Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me". So a second chance can be warranted if you feel that you'll never be fooled again, because if you are, it's on you. So if you're that sure and are willing to look like a fool...go for it. And the fact that my friend is so convinced that he's truly sorry...then she's more than in her power to keep him as long as she understands what'll happen if she's wrong and he does cheat again.
Oh the craziness that is college love...or "love"...or lust...or like...or really love...who knows?
No comments:
Post a Comment